The Satanic Nurses

It's time for a little fun. I may continue this little charade, or I may not. It felt good to get it started, nonetheless...

The Satanic Nurses
Part I

The executive director of the National Association of Union Nurses had burnt-orange-hued hair that erupted from her head like angry shards of sharpened tensile steel wire, warning all who approached to keep the appropriate distance. Gwynn Bitesmiler applied her makeup with the same intensity of purpose with which she groomed her hair. She painted her face to amplify her sharp cheekbones and the fierceness of her brows. Mascara and eye shadow were applied with the objective of giving her eyes the look of a bird of prey. Her clothes were carefully chosen to project the image that this was a no-nonsense woman who was most comfortable wielding power. Every aspect of her grooming, her demeanor, and her carefully chosen words were meant to give her opponents a hint of what they were facing when they faced her.

Her objective was for her appearance to reinforce her reputation: powerful, dangerous, unflinching bitch who would happily sacrifice her closest friends and family if it meant reaching her political goals. She wanted people to fear her, not out of some twisted personal psychosis, but out of her understanding that being feared made attainment of political goals far more likely.

Bitesmiler’s political goals were simple: enactment of legislation that would guarantee that nurses’ pay and benefits were, at minimum, equivalent to ninety percent of the compensation of physicians working in the same environment. Her tactics helped define ‘hardball politics.’ Six nationwide nursing strikes in six years had brought the organization’s message home: either pay us what we’re worth, or face the consequences of hospitals without nurses.

The last nationwide strike was particularly ugly. Critics, and even some supporters, charged Bitesmiler with holding some of the nation’s most vulnerable people— hospital patients— hostage to political demands. Bitesmiler responded by saying that her organization’s members simply decided they could not make a living wage at their chosen profession and stopped practicing it…and would continue to do so…until they received higher pay. She likened the actions of the organization’s members to an individual who, upon evaluating his work load against his pay scale, decides, “it’s just not worth it,” and quits the job. “Our members want to contribute to the health of our citizens, but they have to consider their own circumstances as well,” she said, adding, “When the health care system in this country looks out after its workers the same way it looks out after its patients, then our job will be done.” When she uttered that statement, there were people working to make sure that is exactly what would happen. Those people were not her allies. They were not her allies in the least.