Witness to Safety

Not being a parent, I've not had the experience of watching someone close to me mature in front of my eyes. But during the past year, I've had an experience that I suspect is a bit like it. I have been watching a young woman who works for us mature in some surprising ways, or so I've been thinking.

This young woman is the unmarried mother of a mixed-race child. She has been very private since the very first days of going to work for us. Initially, she struck me as a very bright, but rather uneducated and "country<" young woman who was not at all trusting of other people. She has been quite the introvert during much of the time she has worked for us.

But her behavior has changed during the course of her employment. Early on, when she accompanied me to client events to handle registration, she was very reserved, quiet, and aloof. A friend of hers, a young woman about her age, would visit her but her visits were after hours and our employee made no effors to introduce us. I was fairly she was gay, but I didn't say a thing about it. I expected, though, that if she was, she would have been comfortable telling me, because of some comments I always make during employmenet interviews.

I tell everyone I interview that I have very liberal views and that we are extremely welcoming of diversity of all kinds. I warn interviewees that if they have any prejudices against people because of race, sexual orientation, sex, etc., etc., they would not be comfortable working for us and we would not want them on our staff.

Recently, she accepted an invitation to have dinner with my wife and me and she brought along her partner. While nothing was ever said about their relationship, I got the impression that our employee was beginning to feel more at ease with us. During the past few weeks, I've noticed that she has become much more open, more demonstrative, and she laughs much more easily.

As I started writing this, I thought I was going to write about witnessing her becoming more mature. But the more I think about it, I think what I'm witnessing is someone who is simply feeling safer in her environment. And while that's very good news, it makes me so sad that she must have felt a need to be secretive because of the prevailing attitude in this part of the country.