Beachcomber Vacations

I had an eye exam today, late in the day. Instead of going back to the office, I came home, arriving here about 4:00 pm. Shortly after getting here, I got a call, telling me I'd been selected for a free vacation to one of several destinations of my choice. The call came from Beachcomber Vacations, located in Dallas. I decided to have some fun.

I dutifully answered all the questions, but made a point of acting a bit stupid...and behaving as if I were suspicious, but intrigued by the offer. I was successfully turned over to a closer, who spent a good 30 minutes with me, trying to overcome objections and giving me their load of crap about how all I had to do to get the vacation package was to come to a 90-minute presentation which "absolutely will not be a hard-sales pitch." The woman with whom I spoke finally acknowledged that they would try to sell me membership in their vacation club, but it would be no pressure.

I bit at the bait and said I'd be there. She asked me whether I could be there tomorrow and I said yes. Then she slipped up, continuing on with her abysmally badly written script, saying she would send me a letter with my confirmation number. I said, "hold on, I won't get a letter before I leave to go to the presentation tomorrow!" She stumbled, but recovered nicely by saying she would email or fax it. I gave her my office fax number. Finally, she wanted to verify that my household income was over $40,000. "Finally, there it is," I thought, "the little bit of information they will use to back out if I answer wrong." No, I said, my household income is less than $40,000. Surely it's over $40,000 if you throw in bonuses, stock dividends, savings account interest, etc. No, I replied, it's far below $40,000.

The conversation came to an abrupt end. She quickly said I had to be absolutely sure to bring my confirmation number with me because, without it, I would not be able to claim my vacation. "Please be sure to check your fax to make sure you get it," she said, and if it's not there soon, my colleague will call you to verify." (What?? This person is not doing well trying to get out of this deal.)

I felt good. I had wasted a good 30 minutes of their time and then some. I'm tempted to go to see if they really did fax something to my office...and then actually show up at their sales drill. I'm actually very good at telling hard-sell types that the only reason I'm present is to take their free gift. I'm also good at lying that I taped the entire conversation...and I can quote chapter and verse of the Texas statutes that permit such taping with just one party being aware of it.

I could have some real fun tomorrow!

Before I forget...if Beachcomber calls you, please try to waste their time, if you can!