In a corner

I feel a little like I've been hit, hard, by a powerful boxer whose only goal is to kill me.

Today, first thing, a staff member who I thought was solidly in our court...someone who cared about our business and about us...quit. She gave two weeks notice. She was offered more money, better benefits, all the things that we cannot offer. She is someone I really like, a person who seemed to understand that we're a small business with lots of constraints upon us. But, in the end, that doesn't matter. I don't blame her. She needs to look out after herself. We simply cannot compete.

I'm ready to throw in the towell, but I'm afraid it's too late. We don't have the staying power to throw in the towel now. I'm down at this moment. Very, very down. Our financial reports tell the story; we've been depending on an association that is dying. Our revenues are drying up, fast. This is ugly.

We even talked about just walking away from our business. We can't do that; we don't have any equity. We have no money to fall back on. I've not felt this far down in many, many years. There just doesn't seem to be any options that have happy endings. I don't know what to do. I have never felt quite this way before. I don't like it. I don't like being in a corner, with no where to go.